It's completely impossible to find a girl that won't hurt me. So I'll instead go for the girl who will make the pain worthwhile

Monday, August 31, 2009

8/31/2009 11:39:00 PM

Well, I started off the day by waking up late, and today's meeting at 12pm, I was the OIC. omfg? LOL. I reached around 2pm, and the most happening thing is, no scolding at all. HAHAHA.

Did training for my people and after that had a short BM grouping about next month's activities before we decided to make a move. And good thing is next mth there's more incentives, and bad thing is I will get to enjoy lesser due to NS. !@!#&*

Hmm, yesterday night was definitely a good one. Well it's end of the month and I definitely did some self-reflection within this month and past few months what I've been doing. I wouldn't share it out but it feels good sometimes to think it through with the shower tap on, running cold water all over you. Gets you more relaxed and calm down to think.

All I can say is I finally understand the nature of life. But I wouldn't let nature to control my life, to take it's own course. I'll change the nature and change the course of my life to let it be better. Mistakes are bound to happen along our journey of life and I always repeat this same mistakes. Probably I put too much feelings into the things I do. I finally got this right yesterday, and I'll always remind myself, to do well and to stay happy.

Thanks to a buddy who enlighten me even further before we really pack up and go. He told me a phrase which I felt was very true. I'll put this phrase at the last part of my blogging today, like to end it with a punchline.

Life is bound to be full of obstacles, if we can't swim, means.. we can't swim. Forcing ourselves over the ocean, will only drown ourseleves. To know and to understand is different. =)

And this is the phrase with the note below.. =))

NOTE:"You should only do things, that one WILL appreciate, and not do things, HOPING one will appreciate.".

love,
Jason.

taikib0i

8/31/2009 01:25:00 AM

On this day of your life, Lim, we believe God wants you to know...
... that God has an important purpose for you, and made everything possible for you to succeed.

That's not to say it's an easy purpose, or a convenient one. It might very well seem hard or even impossible, but it only looks that way. The truth is that one day you will look back and see how all the pieces fit together. And how your life has been a complete and utter success.

And I hope it's true yea? Had been hanging on all this while, I wouldn't tell myself perhaps this is not the right ricebowl for me, I would always tell myself as long as I try hard enough, I'll definitely achieve it. Well, I hope my believe and faith will bring me to where I am, otherwise..

Been hard on me though, struggling till today. Been doing it since April 11th 2007, Almost 2 and a half years of effort, skills and knowledge gained. But sometimes, I tend to spread myself some negatives, probably hanging on and being stubborn, will never get me anywhere, and I need to move on? LOL.

Well, to be in this industry, I always tell myself and my guys that your mindset cannot only be strong, you have to be doubly strong. Doesn't matter whether you're in this industry or not, we still got to be doubly strong. Otherwise when something hits us hard, we tend to fall and take a long time to pick up.

After my fall on May 9th 2009, this incident left a deep scar in me. Yes, though I can't do anything about it, but memories can't be erased. It's gonna be with me, till the day I pass away. I can choose to hate, I can choose to forgive. And I've definitely picked the 2nd option. Cause hatred that is within us, will always refrain us to stay happy. If you think about it, it's true. Now I understand why people say, it's always better to have another friend, than another enemy.

Well, I don't believe in God, cause I'm not christian. But I wouldn't say God is not good, or God is wrong. I just hope faith can lead me to where I want to be, who I want to be, and what I want to be.. I have the answers. But who's gonna be with me to go through with me?

taikib0i

8/30/2009 12:34:00 AM

Ahh, my day started off quite well. First day of training at 1pm. Tmr appt ler. LOL, Don't know why nowadays I pump so fast. First day come for training, 2nd day is appt. LOL. Perhaps this should be the pace for fighting car? haha, I haven't lost it. Yeah!

I wanna try 1st day training, at night appt. haha, even faster, but I ask jiuyuan he say too fast.. Yah quite true, unless I last stage last few days, then perhaps I should do this..

Freaking hate my hair now, alot people keep commenting. Yah la it's damn short, but grow abit longer is damn nice alrd. =/

Freaking unlucky day after some stuff happens, damn dulan.. AHH I'm not gonna post it here, in case he/she comes up to read, I'm prolly dead. LOL.

I ate the fish today I caught at bedok jetty last few days, Omg taste damn great and fresh. Mixed with curry too. And congratz to myself, I gained mass again. 2kg. LOL, but I don't seem to be fat. wtf.. Zz. Prolly gained 2kg of toxins, but I alrd stopped smoking alot. =/

I guess it'll take time. hahaha.. Sian, tmr want to take off myself then got in house appt. Zz, I'm gonna snipe one single tmr, and earn 1k. Who ask that prospect spoil my sunday. -.-

Oh yah. Congratz to Hui Miao hitting Marketing Manager! COOL!
Congratz Daniel for hitting Marketing Manager too.

And for the rest, all I can say is... JIAYOU! LOL

Imma jiayou for my car too. =)

love,
jason.. =)

taikib0i

8/29/2009 01:55:00 AM

Woke up at 12pm, because of the stupid thing.. Zz, Went to Keat Hong to buy duck rice for me and James and I went to his house to eat. HAHA, funniest part is when he's pouring the tau huey drink. He didn't pour most of it in the cup, he poured into the basin. -.-

He went to bathe, I closed his room door and used his com. Guess what? After 5 mins, his door opened itself. His house got ghost lah! Happened to Weiyi too. LOL. But I didn't care. =/

Cabbed down to AMK police station cause we were late. Had to freaking report there every now and then but good thing is, this won't continue anymore. CASE CLOSED! OMG!
I'm a free man now, and whatever I do in the future, I'll think twice. haha. =D

After that, stoned at yio chu kang nearby coffee shop, ate chee kuey. drank some stupid grass jelly drink, and headed to yishun mall to walk walk. Then the girl he wanna meet called him. Okay, I accompanied him. We went below her block like 6pm. And 8pm, she's still not down yet. I brother enuff to accompany him liao. After that I bth, went to office to attend my meeting alrd. HAHA. And he continued to wait...
Damn hate girls like this, fucking waste our time.

After meeting, went home.. boring day I guess? spent half the day at yck and yishun doing nothing prospectful. zz. I shall look forward to tmr's activities. =D

taikib0i

8/26/2009 05:24:00 PM

Didn't blog yesterday, because was at bedok jetty the whole night, till 3pm in the afternoon before I headed home. Actually yesterday, was planning to go office, I was already dressed formal and was eating at gold three zero when I asked Jiuyuan and James to join me. We talked and talked. End up they went to meet girls, I went fishing with Ivan.

They were supposed to join us after that but they went drinking. Most were drunk I guess? And they fly us aeroplane. !@#$%&
We 2 person brought 9 rods over, and wtf. LOL, Ivan was damn angry. Haha..

Took some photos... Please click to view them because damn blogger is spoilt! The photos are nice, except for the first 3! =x
NUMBER 5 and 8 HAS ME INSIDE!! =D

Fishing stuff, ZZ. look at how thick the rod bag is? 9 rods inside. =/

Sotong baits, kinda useless. LOL

And and, all the tamban fishes that we normally catch for baits are gone. They kinda went on a holiday I guess? Normally we used to catch around 20-30 plus small fishes for baits, but but, I caught 2 only today. !^%!@#!^!@#$^!@&

And Ivan caught one smaller version of a queen fish. I told him I wanna keep, but he say no meat, so I became damn excited and kicked it back into the sea like a soccer ball. LOL! Damn fun!

(-.-)''!!

Todak!!

My catch for the day! =D

=D

Fishing is fun, but tiring when u decide to ton the whole night there, and it rained for 15mins last night. First time in my whole life I think.. I shivered like hell. Haha, damn cold.. =/

On this day of your life, Jason, we believe God wants you to know...
... that every relationship rests on three legs: accepting, supporting and challenging.

That's really it, isn't it? You want your relationships to be grounded on accepting each other as you are. On supporting each other through the inevitable ups and downs. On challenging each other to become more, to grow, to flourish. Which one of these is the more difficult one for you, and how are you going to practice it in the next 24 hours?

I guess it doesn't matter anymore. I guess this time, it's over..

Well if u're reading this, I have something for you.

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I guess hearts is something u'll love? And at the top, there are some words inside, if u didn't notice. =)

Take care..

love,
Kayden!

taikib0i

8/24/2009 10:25:00 PM

Been 46 hours, since I last touched cigarettes. Am on the right track of quitting. But I've lost the reason to quit.

Perhaps today is the day blogger gets to know what's inside me again.

Well yesterday night, Mr kit said to me that I'm a sharp sword, but I have not taken it out to use for the past 2 years. Yes you did take it out, but at times, you choose to leave it behind. You're like a jigsaw puzzle, with a few missing pieces. Only when you fill them up, You'll not only be a high flyer, You'll be one of the leaders that everybody will look up to.

I know what's my missing piece, I finally know. But sometimes it just pains me when I have to force myself to accept what I have on hand, is not the piece I can hold on to. I'm feeling so vexed and stressed up because if I still don't move, I will be pronounced dead, not by others, but by myself. It's because I'm fighting a war, without a sword, but with my bare hands.

In life, there are some things that are beyond explanation. I'm not being emo, but I kinda have a clearer mind without those nicotine intakes every 1-2 hours. I don't feel as tired, I'm much more alert, and I finally came to a conclusion that I have to seek out for all my answers, before the day comes. Well, just let me know right in the face. Yes, I'll feel hurt as such, but I'll move on faster.

Fcuk shit, I don't really understand what I'm trying to say.
I guess it's just feelings that are beyond words of explanation.

Well, I've finally opened up the 2nd piece of paper, and I've got the answers for this particular word. It's definitely a good motivation. This word is powerful, this word is marvelous. But it's a chinese character, so.. sorry to the malays if u wanna know. The rest, you can just ask me. =)

Last but not least, I hate to be toyed?? =/

love,
jason <3

taikib0i

8/23/2009 02:57:00 AM

Well, blogger still hasn't recover and it's like almost 1 month already. zzz

Went for appointment today at in house, supposedly to meet customer at 1pm, they were late for almost 1 and a half hours. -.-

Well, uncle was supportive, coming again on monday. Was actually tomorrow but they not free. Walau.. haha.. Taught fufeng some stuff cause I need to go NS real soon. Need to pass down all my skills to her.

Went for BM training, and I forgot to pass something to her. Bus-ed to her home caused I topped up my card early in the day, didn't bother to put back in my wallet cause I was lazy. Wanted to take initative, but I guess, she has exams, her own pressure, and I shouldn't do things the way I want to, although I really want to.

And I left my wallet at office, missed my last bus, and I have to walk back to office. LOL. Exciting, took me 45 minutes. Was sweating like hell, but I just felt happy and satisfied. Cause the journey to her place, was definitely worthwhile.

Note: As long as it's within my means, I'll do anything, EVERYTHING, to make you feel satisfied, and happy. Cause simply.. I love you too much. <3

taikib0i

8/20/2009 04:15:00 AM

Yes, though smoking for 4 years, and being a heavy one for the past 3 and a half years, is definitely gonna be hard for me to quit. But yes, I'm determined. And within 3 days later, I'll stop. Goodbye Marlboro! =)

taikib0i

8/18/2009 11:24:00 PM

Cool, blogger still dont allow me to change fonts. Okay, I'm sick and tired of complaining.

Went to office today, did stuffs, which i felt was quite meaningful. Sales gonna come in soon within the next few days. But I don't think it's enough to cross my 1st stage, nevertheless, winners never quit, quitters never win. =)

Attached appt for Daniel, was surprised to meet Regional Manager of Amway. Don't know whether she got dua pao a not, but she never whack me. Sounds so friendly, so I just opened my heart, and did a good presentation, but somehow that appt makes me feel like she's a spy. Haha!

Was happy to see her again, always smiling, always cheerful. Loving a person does not require you to be with him/her, you just want her to be happy. But definitely, being able to be together, is definitely a miracle to me. Gives me a chance to shower love, care and concern, and stuff beyond words can express. Love is so powerful, but yet.. so painful.

这世上最遥远的距离, 是我在你身边, 你却不知道我爱你.

taikib0ii

taikib0i

8/18/2009 01:33:00 AM

Sad to say, yeah, I'm going into the army soon. september 14th will be the day I should fight for the country? LOL!

Good to say I'm in PES E, which means strictly administrative duties only. Somehow I feel it's good, but somehow no. Cause army it's like a one time life experience only. And kenging until like this, I may not get to experience living in the forest etc etc. I went live firing before with a M16. Held guns before, shot before, load bullets, strip rifles before cause those were done in my previous secondary CCA, which was NCC. But nevertheless, I felt one life time experience that needs 2 years to complete is a hell lot of time. So I'll stick to admin work. But the pay sucks, $450 I guess? One day smoke one pack cigarette plus transport, my pay become negative $-500. zz, I need to have $1300 to spend for my expenses to count my life comfortable, which I'm enjoying it for the past 4 months. But I guess all these is coming to an end. Luckily VE I still got downlines that can generate me income. =DDD

And after I ORD from NS, I guess I'll have to start my career ler. Cause when I come out, Age 22 yrs old already. Haha, I'll see how things goes in VE for the next 2 years, cause I'm 8-5pm, so I can still build my organisation, otherwise, I'll go do business with James and Weiyi, or do my uncle's business. zz

Now at least my income for the future is settled, I'm just worried about my own personal life. Hmm, things like maybe finding the right girl? And family and stuff.
Well, it's time to settle down ler. Maybe about e right girl part, let's say I find a girl, I with her 5-6yrs down the road, more or less can marry ler. LOL, I hate changing girlfriends now and then, and I feel it's ulitmately childish. Like puppy love. Wtf? I swear to myself if I'm really going to get into a r/s, I'll stick to her all the way unless she ditch me I guess? Yeah I may not be the perfect person nor guy, but I'm willing to always make changes to suit the environment, and I'll always change for the better, not for the worst. =)

Family wise, I don't know how to make my mum retire, my dad has, but my mum doesn't want to. And I just don't know why, not as if she has not enough money, but I still think it's because she care for us. My sister, brother and I. I guess when we start working independently, then she'll stop. And I hope this day can come soon, cause though I'm not that close with my family members, afterall, she's still my mum, and yes I love her, and I guess it pains me to see her working so hard.

And for myself, FUCK U NS! COME AT THE WRONG TIME.

This whole bloody year of 2009, I won't say it'll be my worse year, cause I'm always prepared to face the worst. But all things hasn't been going well since February.
Okay, January has been good, Career, income, life etc etc. I felt soo loved in that particular month, I did well in VE, did 10k+ PV, earned a big sum of money, I felt I had everything.

February is the start, during chinese new year, lost a lot of money, didn't dare to tell her cause I'm afraid she'll get angry. March was ridiculous, don't even have money to smoke. Zzz, April we starting quarreling, May she left me, June and July, I emoed like siao.. August I started to pick up, have around 5-6 new agents now, can start fighting for Car, but guess what? Army letter come, September 14th need go report. Wtf, luckily my birthday falls on a sunday this year, so I can still book out, and go enjoy. =/ That's the only good thing I can think of. haa..

I know waiting is never perseverance, it's pure stupidity. But I think love for you, has gone beyond words of expression, and I don't know what to say, but...
I love you, and I really do.. <3

taikib0ii

taikib0i

8/15/2009 04:08:00 AM

Okay, first of all, blogging at this timing, I'm really DAMN TIRED. But I've got to rant. I really need to.

I'm feeling damn uncomfortable the whole day along. First of all, I don't even know what I'm doing right now, and to wait or not to. U don't need to understand what I'm trying to say, cause only she'll know. And.. I really need some answers.
I'm falling deeper and deeper and yes, I don't know whether it's the right thing, cause I just don't want to be hurt again, and I hope I don't have to. And I just hope.. she's not playing with my feelings.. =/

2ndly, I don't know who the FUCK passed down e culture of me, keep saying I'm a damn tactical(ji qiao) person? I fucking hate this when people say that to me, and it's not the first time.

So what if I previously worked in another sales company before I came VE? means I'm tactical? means I'm bad? Then why not say other people? There are agents from other companies, worse still from NTI or sunshine empire! They don't start of from VE as well right? So by working in another company before I came here, means I'm tactical? What sort of fucking logic is this?

If I'm really so tactical, will I come up to where I am now? Will I have all the skills leaders taught me that I'm too lazy to pass down?

I don't deny, when you do a business, first of all, definitely, I think of myself and my own income and benefits. And I do think for my agents as well what! WTF I'm tactical? If I'm really so, will fufeng get promoted to ME left with like less than 7k to hit MM? She didn't even have a single personal sales and I DIDN'T FUCK COMPLAIN AT ALL, and I stack sales for her to promote! When she's down based on office stuff, name me a time I neglected her to die. I DIDNT! Even when she needed money, James and I forked out to give her, and we didn't even ask her to return, and it's a few hundred bucks. Haven't I do enough for my organisation? How about James? I stack all my people under him, and he earned almost 3.5k during early this year, didn't I helped them?

Yes I don't deny I did swope sales, and so what if I did? Means it's tactical? Whatever I swoped, I did reward my agents with the total amount of level values and point values they deserve to get, that's why syahidah first month already earn more than 1k. She promoted to ME wad. And how about Hanz? Close one bracelet, I let him hit SE. And because of his bloody customer, I have to wake up so many times at 8am, just to go down to little india to help him out with his customers? Didn't I use my heart and effort to really help?!?!

Everybody in the company swope sales what! Then why must it be always saying I'm the tactical one and not others? Wtf lah. Yes my payout increase by 300% when I swope, but I DIDN'T STEP ON OTHER PEOPLE JUST TO EARN AND PROMOTE! THATS THE MOST IMPORTANT POINT! I totally gave them back what the deserve what. Isn't that fair? Networking business, everyone benefits! close one queen, I give them 3000LV, I lose money and I'm called tactical! CB!

Okay, so that's the sales part. How about education? I don't teach down tactical stuff though I know damn a lot right? Check all my downline's knowledge book! Which part is tactical?! TEAR OUT SHOW ME LAH! I EAT UP!

And I fucking hate to be condemned just because my first job is sales line and just coincidentally I'm not in VE, and you are! Yes the education passed down from the previous company is not very good, but what I've learnt, they are all memories and I cannot forget what! And being here for 2 years, never once I applied during sales appt or recruitment! I just don't understand you people. And I don't even know who the hell passed down this culture!

Being in a business, first of all, I feel you need to be smart. In VE, is it only just about closing sales bringing in new people training them? YES! Yes that's what I do as well, but all I did was, in a smarter way, to benefit my agents and myself more, and wtf I'm tactical!

If I can help you guys close a single, with every LV tapped, every PV achieved, but instead of ur training bonus of $200, I can help u change it to $1000, don't you want to learn that too? It's for you guys benefit! And it's the LEGAL way! AND IT'S FULL CASH! NOT PART PAYMENT! Just some swoping in terms of sumbitting sales! zzzz. And can I say your agent benefit more? Won't he/she be more positive? It's a win-win situation then why not?

BM payout is highest in the company, 40%. Yes I'm at this position. But I don't take 40%, I take 60%! Because I do things in a better way. Is this being smart or tactical?

Tactical why not you say others? Last time fight car, all part payment, tell agent you close one product, I sumbit another one for u free. This is then tactical what! Lying to them, but they actually split their sales. Wtf lah, I don't do that okay! THIS IS THEN TACTICAL!

Fancy doing so much, yet being called names. I just don't feel justified!

Okay I'm done! I feel much better now! =D

NOTE:
I've been very careful with my words already, all this are basically basic negatives that people know, so I hope I'm not spreading out stupid stuff. Just stating out the logics and my feelings! And no names mentioned about except for me and my lovely downlines!

taikib0i

8/14/2009 12:28:00 AM

In case you miss me...

HERE I AM!!! =D

Yes I love you, and though I'm not the best guy in the world I guess? But I'm willing to give you my best.. <3

i miss you..

taikib0i

8/13/2009 12:35:00 AM

OMFG, BLOGGER RECOVERED!! YAY.
but not 100% coz i still cant change fonts and add colours to it. at least i can upload photos. lol

The other day we went to novena to do some shopping. Cause we were waiting for Weiyi to finish his kenging session in Tan Tock Seng. And guessed what? He finished at 3.30am. OMG. Luckily we headed to esplanade to slack. lol

Went to send stock today, after that met Daniel and Amanda. And in e end, Amanda keep asking us go her house and eat. Okay lor, eat.. Eat liao I faster go off. LOL. And I dragged Daniel along. lol. Cabbed back to office because that bugger forgot to take his laptop, then we headed home, and here I am. HAHAHA!

I really hope I can be loved by you...

taikib0i

8/11/2009 09:48:00 PM

成功者绝不放弃，放弃者绝不成功。
心不变，人就不会变。
打造用不完的人。
重点不是谁现中，是都有一个机会。
学，做，教。
再学，再做，再教。

The most upmost class of winning is not by humiliating others
or putting them down.
But it is to show them respect and yet beat them hands down.
Afterall, the greatest enemy is still ourseleves.

Note: I love you baby girl.

我爱爱你！

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

taikib0i

8/08/2009 05:02:00 AM

okay, blogger is not recovering, its okay. just that I cannot upload photos and change fonts, so to me, doesn't matter.

well has been inactive over here for a few days, was damn busy with work and for the past 2 weeks, haven't been coming home early at all, reached home almost 6am everyday, but not all because of office stuff, yeah I did play and enjoy as well. =)

For the month of July, I personally felt like hectic? though it's a fulfilling month. Managed to offered all my help to anyone that needed it, till e extent of having an appointment at 2am, in the middle of hougang. Crazy right? That's how networkers are. LOL
Yes, I'm satisfied with the month of July though. HAHA.

Okay, been meeting Weiyi recently. Caused he's a commando in army and guess what? He keep taking MC till almost 1 month and he just don't want to go back, cause the training is too tough, and I don't deny. He's man enough to go through wadever he has to. And I think having a fast march everyday of 16km, will kill. Fancy jumping off aeroplanes without parachute and the land sometimes has drains and holes? LOL. A lot of people broke their legs, and all the officers did for them, was to kick them out of course because they're injured. So to all readers, Kenging for army is definitely correct. LOL

And for myself, I did nothing much, slacked chilled, and probably just hanging around at James house for the past 1 week, everyday going there. LOL, cause Weiyi's parents didn't know he took MC, so he went James house to camp. HAHA.

Okay change topic, too much things to say. Especially what happened at Jiuyuan's house the previous night. Jiuyuan, James, Weiyi and me. I'm soo trying to sleep, and weiyi's having a fever, James and Jiuyuan were fighting in the middle of the bed. And alot of funny stuff that keep me laughing. What guy's shouldn't go for 5Cs, should go for 5Bs, and Jiuyuan say: WHAT? I have almost all, Balls, Backside etc etc. LOL.

What's on my mind:

Yeah probably is me being one sided, but I seldom care so much for a person before, and the worse thing is when she's sick, I couldn't do much, not because I don't want to, but I couldn't go till that extent. I'll wait.. that's all I can say.

When I found the missing puzzle in my life, I was disappointed that it couldn't fit into the picture.

taikib0i

8/03/2009 05:07:00 PM

I'm at home now stoning, missing her, loving her, thinking of her, dying to see her. lovesick i guess? =/

and.. dying to love her..

taikib0i